Uncle Donnie has suffered business disasters in his life, such as his plan to become the Bill Gates of waste metal recycling. He had to "scrap" that plan when someone explained to him just how many empty cans he'd have to pick up in order to open even a single billion dollar bank account.

There have also been disappointments of a more personal nature. UD's life-long dream of induction into the Blues Hall of Fame was shattered when in reply to his query he was informed by the BHoF Board of Directors that some sort of activity tying him to that musical genre was an absolute essential for consideration.

He was devastated to learn that merely being "really, really depressed" was not a qualifying factor.

After much consideration UD decided to turn his limited but impressive talents to the lucrative field of writing for the internet. In spite of many other options he chose to accept an assignment with Mexconnect. Aside from the outrageous compensation package, UD told this interviewer that other major plusses of the gig were " tons of hot groupies" and "going to work in my underwear". Despite the fact that he has only a fifth grade education, adult ADD, and another undisclosed major psychological disorder, he fully intends to try to hack out a new column each month unless something more interesting comes up.

If you need to contact this amazing talent you may e-mail him at dondelmundo@yahoo.com or stop by Lupe and Juana's Quiche and Tripe on the main drag in La Calera any weeknight after 10:30 for a personal meeting for as long as you're willing to pick up the cerveza tab. If you think you might have trouble identifying him when you arrive just print a copy of the accompanying photo and carry it with you.